Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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