"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize