please come you make the beer taste better
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
