Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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