She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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