I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
