hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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