Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
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