AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Randomize
