I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Randomize