I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
