And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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