so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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