Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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