i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
