if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Moan for me like Helen Keller
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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