i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
