google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
