So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
