Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize