i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Randomize
