everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
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Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM