dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Can't talk, ducks in the car
The adults are the big ones right?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
