Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
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I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
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