I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
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