My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
