marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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