How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
