I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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