what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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