This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
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just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
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Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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