you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize