its not stalking. its research.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
