i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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