Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
