Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
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