You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
