Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
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