Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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