Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning

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(808): View more from Hawaii

i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed

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(305): View more from Florida

If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...

(1-203): View more from Connecticut

your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(440): View more from Ohio

So you threw a sword at me last night

(419): View more from Ohio

I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.

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(360): View more from Washington

We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.

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(512): View more from Texas

He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".

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(701): View more from North Dakota

All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy

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(407): View more from Florida

I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies

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