Texts From Last Night

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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours

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  (617): i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours http://tfl.nu/0tnj
  Replies (34) Good night (2640) Bad night (2638)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.

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  (630): she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers. http://tfl.nu/u7sr
  Replies (9) Good night (1028) Bad night (5323)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.

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  (810): She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance. http://tfl.nu/vgvp
  Replies (69) Good night (9117) Bad night (945)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.

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  (440): woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out. http://tfl.nu/7ruz
  Replies (28) Good night (1470) Bad night (5241)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids

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  (773): halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids http://tfl.nu/g564
  Replies (19) Good night (4435) Bad night (1480)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.

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  (703): When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship. http://tfl.nu/12c3
  Replies (6) Good night (3058) Bad night (790)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm

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  (603): You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm http://tfl.nu/1h6h
  Replies (2) Good night (3028) Bad night (798)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.

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  (817): Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer. http://tfl.nu/3l5u
  Replies (6) Good night (3145) Bad night (821)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.

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  (256): The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire. http://tfl.nu/a418
  Replies (3) Good night (1060) Bad night (2404)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry

  (1-307): View more from Wyoming

  I'm hurrying

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Dude. She just shit herself.

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  (307): Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry (1-307): I'm hurrying (307): Dude. She just shit herself. http://tfl.nu/4o8b
  Replies (21) Good night (1036) Bad night (4205)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized

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  (847): Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized http://tfl.nu/hh8z
  Replies (16) Good night (2746) Bad night (709)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.

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  (724): Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge. http://tfl.nu/wjo8
  Replies (3) Good night (1566) Bad night (635)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.

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  (251): my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car. http://tfl.nu/1aw9
  Replies (2) Good night (503) Bad night (718)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.

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  (512): I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again. http://tfl.nu/arot
  Replies (5) Good night (877) Bad night (2199)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew

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  (434): I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew http://tfl.nu/2v1b
  Replies (5) Good night (652) Bad night (340)

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