I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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