Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
