Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
