I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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