my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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