if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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