i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
