new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize