were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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