Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
