Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
