I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
