It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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